The Art of Small Talk: Questions that Open the Door to the Gospel

Sharing the gospel can feel overwhelming. We know Jesus’s command to “Go therefore and make disciples of all nations” (Matt. 28:19), but if we’re honest, we can get so caught up in our daily tasks that we miss opportunities to share the love of Jesus with people we interact with each day. 

God’s call to make disciples is the same for every believer (Acts 1:8; Rom. 10:14). How we do this will differ. If sharing the gospel with strangers on street corners gives you anxiety, take a deep breath. There are plenty of opportunities to share our faith in the daily routines of life if we look for them.  

Small Talk Is a Bridge

I think the area of witnessing is one that every Christian can grow in, regardless of personality. It took me a while to learn how to share my faith in a way that was consistent with my gifting. I thrive in one-on-one conversations about matters of the heart. As it turns out, I am also really good at small talk and asking questions, likely due to ten years in the customer service industry where small talk was the common currency of communication. 

The art of listening well and asking good questions can be learned. As I’ve grown in these skills over the years, I’ve been able to build connections that grow into relationships with opportunities to share my faith. Though I’m an introvert, I love meeting new people and hearing their stories.

This is where I’ve found the art of small talk particularly helpful. For the people you see semi-regularly or in the context of shared hobbies, these questions can help bridge the gap between “What did you do this weekend?” and “What do you think about Jesus?” and turn small talk into gospel conversations. 

1. Ask about values and beliefs 

My favorite question to ask when meeting someone for the first time in a professional setting (such as a haircut or other appointment) is “How long have you been a (name of profession)?” followed by “What made you want to become a (name of profession)?” Asking about what they do everyday is an easy entry point.

There will be many open doors you can walk through after these initial questions, such as:

• How did you get started?
• What’s your favorite part about your job?
• What’s been the most challenging thing in your position?

In asking these questions, you’re looking for clues that reveal what’s important to them. You’re listening for the emotion behind what they share. Their answers will reveal what they value and inform your next question so you can move the conversation to topics of belief. When I do this, I notice people’s faces light up when I ask them deeper questions about themselves, as if it’s the first time someone noticed them that day. 

2. Ask about interests 

Another one of my go-to questions to get people talking is “What do you like to do for fun?” I love this question because they can take this wherever they want. People like talking about themselves, so the more you keep asking questions based on what they share, the more they will open up. As you listen, think, What don’t I know about what I just heard? Then use it as a good guide to keep asking questions. 

The details people give you in response to these questions will help you see things from their perspective and help you ask more informed questions that get to the heart. Asking questions also gives them the opportunity to share what they are comfortable with.

3. Three easy topics

During this year’s THINK conference on evangelism, the speaker mentioned three topics to use when asking people questions: weekend, weather, and sports. After I heard this, I was amazed to discover that, in my experience, most small talk does fall within these three categories. These are safe topics for people and can often lead into deeper questions.

I often start with the question “What are your plans this weekend?” I don’t ask “Do you have plans this weekend?” which can be answered with a simple yes or no. Asking open-ended questions is the best way to keep people talking. 

For example, I recently asked someone I see weekly what he did that weekend. He said he went to some of the Indy 500 festivities. That could mean a lot of different things. Instead of assuming I knew what that meant and the conversation ending there, I followed up by asking another one of my favorite questions: “What did that look like?” I was starting to get a clearer picture, but there were still details I didn’t have. My next question was “Who did you go with?” He started talking about his family, and if I’d had more time, I would have asked more questions about the nature of his family relationships, which had the potential to reveal his values and beliefs.

Share the Gospel Boldly

If you slow down long enough to listen to what people choose to share, this will inform the types of questions you ask. As you become more comfortable with small talk and grow in your skill of listening and asking questions, the entry points to sharing the gospel will multiply. 

God has uniquely gifted you to reach the people in your world with the gospel. God is sovereign over everything, including who you interact with everyday, and he has placed specific people in your life on purpose. You may be the only person they know who loves Jesus. 

People are eager for hope, and in my experience, they will listen to what you have to say when they know you care about them. Even when you don’t know what to say, the Spirit will give you words (Luke 12:11-12). Jesus promises to be with us wherever we go, and every Christian has the power of the Holy Spirit (Matt. 28:20; Rom. 8:11). That means you have everything you need. So, go out and share your faith boldly with the people God has placed in your life.